...all over America high school and college kids thinking'Jack Kerouac is 26 years oldand on the road all the time hitch hiking'...
...while there I am almost 40 years old, bored and jaded..
I was surrounded and outnumbered
and had to get away
to solitude again or die.
So Lawrence Ferlinghetti wrote and said,
"Come to my cabin in Big Sur.
No one'll know."
- Jack
One fast move, or I'm gone.
- Jack
Because on the fourth day
I began to get bored
and noted it in my diary with amazement,
"Already bored?"
Even though the handsome words of Emerson
would shake me out of that,
where he says in one of those
little red leather books
and is relieved and gay
when he has put his heart into his work
and done his best.
Yet I went crazy inside three weeks.
In me and in everyone,
I felt completely nude of
all poor protective devices,
like thoughts about life
or meditations under trees
and the ultimate and all that shit.
In fact, the other pitiful devices of
making supper or saying,
"What I do now next? Chop wood?"
I see myself as just doomed,
an awful realization that I have
been fooling myself all my life
thinking there was a next thing
to do to keep the show going, and actually
I'm just a sick clown,
not even really any kind of common sense,
animate effort to ease the soul
in this horrible, sinister
condition of mortal hopelessness.
I hate to write.
- Jack
If you should ever stop using that smile,
how could the world go on?
- Jack
Lew: Drinking any less?
Jack: Unless we're drinking.
Lew: That we are.
How uninformed people can be thinking
insane people are happy.
- Jack
Lew: My God, he can do all that
then even explain while he's doin' it.
Neal: Who wants to give it a try?
Lew: I'm good.
Neal: Come on, Jack.
We both know a little something about retreading.
Jack: No, no, no. I'm fine where I am.
Neal really loves me like a brother.
And more than that,
he gets annoyed at me sometimes
especially when I fumble
and bumble like with a bottle.
- Jack
I'm a language spinner
and you're an idea man.
- Jack
Whoa! Hey, you got to watch out for snakes, huh?
Never can tell which kind it's gonna be.
-
Everything he asks me and says to me
represents something important
about the absolute I may be missing.
- Billie
I realize it's just a little family home scene
and I'm just a nut in the wrong place.
Meanwhile, Neal has completely disappeared.
- Jack
Jack: Philip, I'm sorry I ruined our day
by sleepin' like this.
Philip: You needed to sleep. I told you.
Jack: How long was I sleepin'?
Philip: Ages.
Jack: I'm sorry.
Philip: Why should you be sorry?
I love you, anyway.
Jack: Was I snorin'?
Philip: You were snoring all day
and I've been sitting here all day.
What a beautiful day.
Jack: Yeah, it's been a beautiful day.
How strange.
Watchin' life...
maybe we don't know
all that we think we know.
- Jack
I'm so exhausted
I can't do anything
or see anybody.
- Jack
I've never screamed in my life.
It's the first time I'm not confident
I can hold myself together
no matter what happens.
The devil's come after me tonight.
The creek will give me water
that will clear away everything.
- Jack
Even if we never see each other again,
let this last night be beautiful. Please.
- Billie
Ferlinghetti will say,
"that's all there is to it".
Take it easy. Everything's okay.
Don't take things too serious.
It's bad enough as it is
without you going the deep end
over imaginary conceptions,
just like you always said yourself.
- Jack
Something good will come
out of all things yet
and it will be golden
and eternal just like that.
There's no need to say another word.
- Jack
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